Normally I prefer to get my news overseas or at least from as neutral of a news source as I can find. It's not always possible and I am horrendously lazy about such things, as I've already posted. Still I don't know whether it's my human obsession with the extreme, or my desire to know the odd. Maybe it's my wandering along insanity's sharp ravine that makes me crave those stories. Makes it so I can't stop reading. So there I sit opening tab after linked tab.
I know there is better things I can do with my time, but it's just so compulsive. I've even taken to opening a separate browser for my habits so as not to mess up the 30 or so tabs I keep open in the main browser (yes I've abused tabbed browsing for probably a decade - I used to use Opera). I just can't help it. I have to learn about the depravity and the heroism, the odd discoveries and the side notes. I used to be a loyal reader of News of the Weird, and now I find it all on Fox News.
Not the National Headlines, or the International Affairs, no. I'm talking about the articles about Mom's who kill their kids. People who abuse drugs. The times when people are unobservant. When they do stuff that seems crazy. The extreme. I can spend hours loading tab after tab after tab. Scrolling to the bottom of each article to see what else Fox News has to offer to feel my craving.
I feel I do a fairly good job of observing people. It's been a hobby for probably all of my life. Never have I observed the people in these stories. I know I shouldn't read them. They are seldom edifying (although sometimes the health and science ones are really really intriguing), they do not lift up my spirit. Really there is nothing good about them, yet they feel a core desire for blood. Like the spectators at a Gladiatorial match. I want to see, yet not see. So I peak through my fingers and absorb every last drop.
It's been a few months since I've indulged in my weakness, but I know it's only a matter of time before I fall again. Before I let those basal desires surge forth and one friend's linked article leads me back into the depravity of my addiction to Fox News.